What We Do In The Shadows Recap: The Prisoner

Entropy. That’s kind of a cool word, right? To some, it may read as once you start something, you can’t undo it. To others, it’s a lack of predictability. To me, it’s the Greek form of transforming from the inside. From where we last left, Guillermo went HAM on the children of the night, before realizing he was a Van Helsing. It’s not something you can forgive, but maybe with his crew, they can forget?
On this opener of the tertiary season with What We Do In The Shadows (FX) entitled, “The Prisoner”, we’ll dive into where allegiances lie, who is lying, and what lies ahead for the quartet of bumbling phlebotomists.

It’s a rainy night on the Vampiric Residence. The crew knows the score, but Nandor (Kayvon Novak) is the only one going to the mat for Guillermo (Harvey Guillen). The rest of them is pushing for him to die, but only his Master is wanting him to leave. Nadja (Natasia Demitriou) wants his blood to be shed, not shared. So what’s the next best solution?

Imprison him.

The thing is that he was simply trying to protect the Clan, and he in his heart of hearts knows it. Being the savvy familiar he is, he breaks out of the cage anytime he wants because why not?

In a heart-to-heart, when he decamps to his cell so nobody is the wiser, Nandor, is kind. He gives him food (albeit raw chicken) but it is Guillermo that gives his Master food for thought. He was his protector. He was his watcher and though, yes, dude killed that which he looked after, it’s the warrior’s code. You shall not kill another that looked after you, no matter how heinous the crime was. Talk about being down for the Count!

I guess it doesn’t matter now, because, though Guillermo installed cameras around the domicile, an unkindness has shown up. Breaking out of his paper prison, Guillermo shows up, stakes blazing, chucking them at the The Guide (Kristen Schaal), though she’s just too fast for him. She’s simply a messenger, and what is the message? The house is called to the Council.

I will say, off the bat, pun intended, Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch) is pretty diabolical in this episode and I love it. He’s basically 120 Days of Sodom incarnate with a dapper white suit.

In Guillermo’s captivity, he’s been video recording himself just to keep his sanity. This pays off because, with his newfound power, he can break out whenever he wants once the house is in slumber. What does he do with this self-imposed liberation? He fucking cleans the house and dispatches corpses!

The interesting thing is though Nadja is growing fond of him, the murder of vampires is an inescapable sin for a familiar, one which you shan’t recover. Laszlo (Matt Berry) couldn’t give two fucks of how it ends up because he’s got his house and his woman. The last thing he needs is another headache in the form of a sleeper cell. Nandor seems to have his six though because of the aforementioned warrior code. You protect your own and in-kind, so you will be taken care of.

Not that it matters, for when the unnamed herald of the Vampiric Council announces herself with an unkindness of 87 Ravens, they didn’t even notice. Only Guillermo did. There’s a blindspot in their house and only a mortal could sense it. That isn’t a good look and isn’t very becoming.

Regardless, they’ve been chosen. This house is chosen. To do what? What do you do when you have capable fuck ups? Make them the head of the Vampiric Council of the Eastern Seaboard of the New World, but of course!

With this power coursing through their non-functioning veins, they decide to make Guillermo, not a liability but rather an asset. He’s now their bodyguard, and though they try a quadrant of hypnosis, it’s just nonsense. He knows it’s bunk and just goes about life, doing their bidding, making them think they are above him.

The thing is, this ain’t over yet, not by any stretch. With great power comes great privileges. The only thing is when you have 4 egos running a household, there is only one voice. When you talk over each other, a voice is never truly heard.

In the chamber, they not only have the task of not only executing their own but also those who have transgressed and being the judge and jury. This isn’t a fun thing for any of them, but their bodyguard’s been handily doing a bang-up job. It’s as if it’s in his DNA!

There is only one Throne though and though they aren’t about putting a thumbs up, they are certainly about who takes the seat!

As an opener for the third season, I was very happy with this. Paul Simms came to play! This didn’t disappoint. The show only gets better and better with subtle jokes and japes even wittier than the last time. It’s coming just in time for Autumn too when Halloween is the King of Holidays. I truly do believe if vampires exist and they walked among us, they’d be our friends. Their “Hello” is just a little different.



Robert Kijowski
Robert Kijowski
Robert Kijowski is a script writer who enjoys a good chuckle and an even better weep when indulging in art both good and even better bad. He's written for pop culture and film websites alike. You can hear him on Spotify (After the Credits) and reach out on Instagram, X or by English Carrier Pigeon.

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