If you died, what would you say to a version of your living self? It would be like a version of time travel except the paradox is way odder. If you died, would you said to yourself ‘I wish I said that thing’ (which by the way is called Esprit De L’escalier). Fuck no. you’d want to be your best friend in all of the mire and muck. You would be your own fucking Calvin and Hobbes. You would want to them to be the Mickey for your Rocky. But what if, what if, for an even a day, you could talk to your former self? Welcome to What We Do In The Shadows (FX), episode “Ghosts.”
Upon a house meeting, the company initially doesn’t believe in its existence. Guillermo gets it right with cracking, not breaking the fourth wall. They’ve been through werewolves, necromancers, zombies and a council of bloodsuckers and Babadooks. They’ve seen a shit ton. But ghosts don’t exist? Like what?
Oh and Colin (Mark Proksch) doesn’t believe in ghosts, but does believe in what? ‘Updawg’. Like what is that? You will learn later.
Through a seance, the crew tries to conjure this invisible mayfly. Oh, do they. The ghost of Jeff/Gregor (Jake McDorman) is brought up. He’s simply here for Nadja (Natasia Demtriou) and he could scare them with a Beetlejuice parlour trick. This sends Nandor (Kayvan Novak) to go nuts and attempt homicide… on a fucking ghost with a sword and a knife! His reward is a fall and ectoplasm all around. Good luck getting that shit out.
As the entire crew marvels at a ghost interacting with one of their own, Nadja explains how he’s basically an ex that won’t leave her alone. His soul comes back and back to her as he’s they are attached like a fucking magnet. Now that he’s deceased, she’s lost the intensity, thus the attraction is gone. She’s basically lost her lady boner for him.
The squad gets an idea. They conjure up their own former selves. We realize these are they are their best friends or worst enemies.
The ghost of Nandor is “killing it”- literally. He’s decimating villages and taking wives. So what did his ghost want?
The ghost of Nadja was the same. She was SLAYING it and was an independent woman. What happened her former ghost asked her. She’s got to shack up with a bunch of guys? She fell fucking cities! Nadja tells Gregor (or the ghost of) to fuck off whilst she sits down and has a heart to heart… with her former self.
We actually find out what Nandor’s spirit wants. It’s actually simpler than you would think. Throughout the eras of when he slew countries, there was only one steed that was there for him. It was his bestie. It was his horse, “John.” I personally think that was a beautiful touch and I’ll get more on that in a moment. Both he and his ghost can communicate on something (as his ghost speaks in archaic language.)
We also find out why the horse was the desire of his ghost. As heaven would have it, in a battle with limited soldiers and no provisions, he had to eat his best friend and took that to the fucking grave. Hey, when the going gets tough, the for not said for are tough and chewy.
This leads us into a moment of clarity. Nandor’s ghost needed to be reunited with this equine familiar and in that, they go both disappear into the ether. To me, this was a fucking brilliant moment. I swear, if this season gets this creative, which I think it will, it will be amazing.
In letting go of his haunted past, both Colin and Nandor both hug it out. That’s something we need now. Hugs.
As Nadja hides her doll, her now bestie in plain sight, she’s realized Laszlo’s gotten rid of his spirit, but with ‘plasma’ everywhere. Yeah, it went there. He’s finished he mission with a cone of shame, but he’s a narcissist anyway, so isn’t just masturbation?
As a final fuck you to anyone, Colin deploys the incantation spell to see his dead grandmother. Oh, it ain’t for anything else but to workshop his ‘Updawg’ joke. ‘Updawg?’ ‘What’s updawg?’ ‘Not much what’s up with you?’ The long set up is what I love about this series. So he could have asked her anything but just wanted an audience of one to get it and promptly blew out her candle, which cancels her from existence. Colin, never change.