Mystery Science Theater 3000 Season 11, Episode 6: Starcrash Review

Mystery Science Theater 3000 "Starcrash" review: Hasselhoff in a Star Wars knockoff

The sixth episode of the eleventh season of Mystery Science Theater 3000 asks what happens when a Star Wars imitation stars David Hasselhoff and Christopher Plummer. The film is Starcrash, a 1978 Italian-American space opera directed by Luigi Cozzi under the name Lewis Coates, and the episode reached Netflix on April 14, 2017, along with the rest of the 14-episode revival season that fans had crowdfunded. It carries overall number 203 in the series and features a guest appearance by Jerry Seinfeld.

The movie is a cult favorite in its own right, which makes it an unusual target. Starcrash stars Caroline Munro as the smuggler Stella Star and Marjoe Gortner as her sidekick Akton, with Hasselhoff as Prince Simon, Plummer as the Emperor and Joe Spinell as the villain, Count Zarth Arn. John Barry composed the score, the film was shot at Cinecittà in Rome and it was released by New World Pictures. Critics were mostly negative at the time. Cozzi has said that its design predated Star Wars, but it is widely seen as a cash-in, with its own space wizard, a robot with a drawl and lightsaber-like weapons.

For Jonah Ray and the Bots, the challenge is that the film is already in on its own joke. A movie that plays tongue-in-cheek leaves a riffing crew little room to be funnier than the source, so the episode has to find humor in the gaps.

What Starcrash is actually about

The plot, such as it is, follows Stella and Akton as they search for the survivors of a crashed starship, for the Emperor's missing son and for a superweapon hidden by Zarth Arn. The production reportedly cost about four million dollars, and it shows in the effects, which reach for a vast scale on a modest budget. It is a movie with big ideas and a small budget, and the combination is why it has lasted.

That is also why it suits the riffers. A film that overreaches is easier to joke about than one that settles for mediocrity, and Starcrash overreaches in every scene.

The riffing: a slow start, a strong finish

The first half is uneven. Most of the jokes go after Stella's baffling lack of clothing, which is conspicuous in a mining colony, and after Elle, a robot with a puzzling southern accent. Things pick up in the second half, when the plot, such as it is, starts to happen. The film is so incoherent that events occur without explanation, and the riffs get better as the chaos increases.

The best moments come late. Akton's fistfight with Thor draws chants of Thor from Jonah and the Bots, who also give the combatants space-themed names for every kick and chop. At the end, when about thirty ships take off in a sequence that runs two to three minutes, the crew names them all after Starcrash playsets.

The episode wisely avoids repeating the last great space-saga installment of the show's earlier run, Space Mutiny from season 8. Nobody wants a rehash, and the writers know that doing the same trick twice rarely works.

The sketches and the Seinfeld cameo

The host segments are better than the opening suggests. The cold open, a game of spin the bottle, is a weak start, and the Invention Exchange is similarly flat, with the Mads inventing a Condiment Poncho to go with a Salsa Sombrero. It is rescued by Servo dressed as BB-8, who says the gimmick can turn any movie into a blockbuster, and then has to drop it because Disney objects.

The three middle sketches are solid. Crow pitches a script called World War Space, a project with lots of complex world-building and an extraordinary amount of laser noise. Akton, played by Jonah, visits the Satellite of Love and turns out to be less capable than the Bots who idolize him: Servo sees him as a father figure and asks him to show off his powers, but Akton has no idea what they are or how they work. Then Jerry Seinfeld, an old friend of series creator Joel Hodgson, arrives on Moon 13 as Freak Masterstroke with business advice for the Mads that does not include holding the planet hostage with a death ray.

The closing sketch brings it all together. Jonah plays Zarth, laughing maniacally, while torpedoes fire and stars are crashed, and Max and Kinga watch slack-jawed, wondering if their playtime counts as being driven mad.

Season 11 at a glance: every film riffed

Highlights of the Starcrash episode

• The Thor fight: space kicks, space chops and a chorus chanting the name.
• The launch sequence: about thirty ships take off while the Bots name them after toy playsets.
• Servo as BB-8: a joke about turning any movie into a blockbuster, ended by a studio threat.
• Akton on the Satellite of Love: a hero who has no idea how his own powers work.
• Jerry Seinfeld as Freak Masterstroke: an old friend of Joel Hodgson giving the Mads business advice.
• The Force Awakens gag: a line about C-3PO's red arm that stands out among the Star Wars jokes.

Is the Starcrash episode good? Verdict

It is a fun Mystery Science Theater 3000 to sit through, though not a masterpiece. The film's own self-awareness limits what the riffs can do, and the first half spends too many jokes on one subject. The references are wide-ranging, with jokes that point to Alien, Planet of the Apes and The Force Awakens. A Planet of the Apes line, with Crow doing a Charlton Heston impression about blowing something up without knowing what it is, is one of the better lines.

The sketches carry more weight than usual. The Seinfeld cameo is a treat for longtime fans, and a couple of moments are lifted straight from the film in a way that suggests the writers had fun with the source.

The season as a whole is the real story. Season 11 revived the series for Netflix with Jonah Ray as host, Hampton Yount as Crow, Baron Vaughn as Tom Servo and Felicia Day as Kinga Forrester, and an episode like "Starcrash" shows that the new crew can handle a cult classic without leaning on the old jokes. For viewers who want the best of the season, there are better episodes, but for anyone who likes bad sci-fi and good riffs, this one is a safe recommendation.

The final image, Jonah as a narrator promising a rousing space saga called Nothing Ever Happens, is as good a summary of the film as anyone could write.

Sources

• Mystery Science Theater 3000, Wikipedia — cast, season 11 episode list and release dates